more single parenthood

While Ryan's work schedule has been less than ideal since we moved home, his current project has been quite a doozy! Many projects are 2-3 months total but this one has been going on since last winter with long-ish hours most of that time.  As many projects are, this one has been delayed several times and the original end date of last July in now promised to happen in the next week or two. 
I don't like referring to myself as a single-parent in these times because I know I have it WAY easier than true single-parents and that the financial support all of Ryan's hard work provides are just an added burden for those really going it alone.  That said, life's still tough right now-for all of us.  I have always been happy to take on lots of the tasks on the home-front as I think that's part of the contribution of  a stay at home partner (man or woman.)  I will say bike repair, tree cutting, and advanced lawn care were areas I was always happy to save for Ryan that I've had to tackle in the last week. It is nice to feel independent and to know I can handle just about anything on my own with Ben in tow, but it's also nice to experience life with the partner that I chose and love.  
It has been eye-opening how much the 20 minutes of solitude I get when Ryan puts Ben to bed effects my attitude and energy levels, not to mention the difference 30 minutes of post-dinner Dad play-time has on our whole life.  Having those 30 minutes each day to do dishes and pick up the house before another day begins are priceless and allow me to exercise and do other tasks without guilt while Ben is at preschool. 
It's also really hard not to be mad at a company that lets their employees work 20 hours a day for days on end after months of 60-80 hour weeks.  I am envious of those able to find a work/life balance while still advancing their careers but when I look around at friends and neighbors, I see proof that it's possible.  
Right now we are focused on the light at the end of the tunnel that is the end of this project and after that we will actively work on finding a better balance for all of us.  
The deeper point of this soap-box rant is that I know I have it SO great compared to parents really going it alone.  That doesn't mean the tough days and struggles aren't justified but at the end of those challenging days I think about Ben's birth mom and her day-to-day life on her own with two kiddos.  And then I think about Ben and all that is BEN being added to that mix and I am overwhelmingly grateful for the way life has worked out for all of us!

Swimlabs

Ben's latest swimming venture is turning out to be successful.  Swimlabs is turning out to be a great choice and has also been successful for a few different family friends of ours. 
After the first week, Ben's new teacher, John, questioned whether he would be successful in the beginner 2 class but when I assured him Ben's cries of "mommy, mommy!," only came when it wasn't his turn and that he'd been spoiled by private lessons for most of the last year, he agreed to let him try another few weeks.  As I suspected, he was quite successful in the second week and although the 3 other boys in his group are all 5 and a little more advanced, John thought Ben would catch up quickly.   The location is a bit of a trek and the 5 pm drive home in rush hour is less than fun but I think it will all pay off.  We are also hoping to make a regular date of meeting Ryan for an early dinner on these nights when his current project wraps up. I'm also working to clear our Saturday mornings to add an additional day.  While there is truly no-one better than Megan who taught Ben this summer, I'm hopeful that John and Swimlabs will be a great replacement in the winter months.

feast, flood, and fun

Wichita friends Brian and Angela came for a visit over the last weekend to see the band The Lumineers at Red Rocks.  Thanks to Angela's fan club membership we were able to get tickets to one of two sold out shows.  Despite many many hours spent in different degrees of downpour, our night at the concert was definitely the better one because the band was backed by the entire Colorado Symphony Orchestra for most of their show.
Brian and Angela arrived Saturday afternoon and we headed home to play and prep dinner.  Brian's suggestion of heading to the playground was a perfect activity for Ben and a great walk for Luke but continued storms made our park visit short. Many parts of Colorado have been flooding over the last week in what has been called a "thousand year flood," and "flooding of biblical proportions." Boulder and Aurora have been hardest hit with lots of other areas suffering lots of damage.  A few lives have been lost and I'm sure the clean-up will take years.  Thanks to the rain, we couldn't enjoy dinner on the deck but it was delicious and simple none-the-less.
We all tried to sleep in a little Sunday but Ben missed the memo. :) The iPad kept him quiet while Ryan and I prepared breakfast and started packing for the day.  According to Angela, Brian's second helping of breakfast potatoes was as rare as the flood and we all got well-fueled for the day ahead. We dropped Ben at MeeMee's to spend the night and grabbed a bite to eat (yes, more food,) and headed to Red Rocks to let the fun begin.  This day also happened to be mine and Ryan's sixth anniversary and except for less rain, we wouldn't have changed a thing about the day.

these aren't even THE stairs :)

cute! and so dry!

proof we are soul-mates:)

buddies

 

the trek in begins

waiting patiently and wet

what rain?

Said rain began about 30 minutes after we lined up on the stairs to get in and did.not.stop. for nearly 7 hours. I think we all stayed pretty warm and a little dry and our 3rd row seats and amazing musicians meant that at least for me, the rain was soon the furthest thing from my mind.  Ryan has said over and over how much fun he had! 
Monday morning came WAY too early and off we went back to the airport to bid our friends adieu.  Visits with good friends are never long enough but we are overwhelmingly thankful to these friends for making the quick trip to help us celebrate.

Red Rocks is special for us because Ryan first professed his love here one starry and concert-free night while we looked out at the city lights.  Just the fact that he picked a special place and time to do what's often a quick and simple mention is telling of the person he is.  Six years before on this day we were married at a little chapel down the hill that looks up at the amazing rocks that form the amphitheater.  Red Rocks is a really amazing place with a crazy ability to create some amazing experiences where nature's glory and lots of happy energy come together to create experiences that for me are nothing short of spiritual.  This day was no exception and I know that for both Ryan and me it was the perfect reminder of the depth of our love and the importance of taking time to honor it.

-Thanks to both Brian and Ang for several of the above pics and for joining the modern world and getting smart phones so they could take and share the pics with ease!

Miller's End of Summer Party

The Miller's have quite a view!

Yesterday we had a busy, fun-filled and HOT day! Ryan was stuck in Cali for work so I arranged to carpool with the Lineberry's from MeeMee's house up to the Miller's Annual End of Summer Party.  First we got to see Grace perform some gymnastics at the Arvada Harvest Festival.  It was VERY hot and the routine they did was somewhat beneath Grace's ability so I will be using this story on her wedding day to remind her how much we love her.
Next we were off to Erie for some more fun in the sun.  Thankfully the Miller's had just installed a wonderful patio and HUGE awning to provide some shade.

They also brought in a bouncy house whose closed top also made for a slight break from the hot sun.  Ben came out only for forced water breaks and when some big kids got a little too rough.  It was my first experience being at a big party with lots of kids whose parents I didn't know and I'll say that was challenging and leave it at that for this post.

Sweet Hailey got in on the action.

 

 

pooped

The Miller's are avid gardeners and home-brewers of amazing beers.  Unfortunately my picky tummy never lets me try them without trouble but I heard repeated rave reviews. 
The hot busy day with no nap caught up with Ben shortly after 6 pm and a bit of a breakdown began.  In the car ride home he was really worried I was going to leave him and also repeated, "no MeeMee home, go to Ben's home." So, after single-moming it for several days, I gave in and we bagged our plans to stay at MeeMee's and went home.  He was fast asleep by 8:20 and 11 hours later shows no signs of waking soon.  A sure sign of a great day-I'd say!

Jay and Turner digging in the dirt.

After the nice pic with Cole, I taught Sara how to really ride a tractor.

Big thanks to the Miller's for a fantastic afternoon.  Lisa really goes all out with themes and decor for her parties and I didn't get pics of all the wonderful details but they certainly didn't go un-noticed.