9 Months!!

There is no well-baby visit between 6 and 10 months for us (12 months for lots of babies), so I have been a bad blogger mama when it comes to keeping up with the stats-for shame!  I decided 9 months was a standard milestone month after 6 so I'd throw out the excuses and get it done.  Ben will officially be 9 months this Friday and will be with his MeeMee helping her celebrate her Birthday.  4 days early he weighed 21.4 lbs and was 28 inches long, (as best I could tell on my own.)  His percentiles are 67% for weight and 45% for height.

He is still making his way through a long list of veggies, and we haven't found anything besides avocado that he doesn't like to eat.  He is now also eating bananas, applesauce, pureed mangoes and his current fave-pureed cantaloupe.  He also eats puffs, wheat bread in small pieces, and occasionally, rice.  I am still making most of his food and try to let him eat parts of our meals as he can.  I won't start meats or proteins until our ten-month visit, but it's crazy to think he will be eating most everything we eat in no time.

Ben consistently holds his own bottle and sippy cup

Eating more, of course, requires teeth, and Ben has 3 in that department.  He has his 2 bottom middle and one upper adjacent to the center.  His Tante lovingly refers to him as Snaggletooth and I must admit that the more it comes in, the more it makes me giggle.

A peek at the 2 bottom teeth 

In other health development, we did discover in the last 3 months that Ben has mild eczema.  We discovered it on his tummy and it cleared quickly with treatment.  We have thankfully not seen another sign of it but sadly had to stop using Dreft laundry detergent and all lotions- unscented creams only!  Thankfully, he should outgrow it by adulthood.  

Ben's left eye has had a blocked tear duct since birth and that finally opened in the last few weeks.  I was cautious not to count my chickens after the first week it was clear, but it has been several now with no sign of seeping or lack of drainage.  The Dr's had told us they almost always clear on their own by 1 year and Ben's did just that.

Ben is sitting like a champ and rolling everywhere but we think crawling is still a month or two out.  In the last week he has started pulling one leg at a time into more of a crawling position, but I don't think he's ready to take off just yet.  Knowing how much life will change when he crawls means this Mama is not in a hurry.  He has also discovered cords in the last two days and thankfully has not pulled anything down onto himself.  I am confident there will be LOTS of baby-proofing in our summer plans.

Ben is still sleeping well and consistently from about 8 pm to 6 am.  Naps are still keeping me on my toes but we usually have a mostly happy, well-rested baby on our hands.

Ben LOVES his jump-jump (doorway jumper) and loves to wind it up in one direction and then pull his feet up off the ground and let it unwind in the opposite direction.  I am shocked at how fast it spins and how much he enjoys it and yes, I am afraid of what the future holds.  Ben still enjoys blocks and books and his talking kitchen and Chicco Driver toy.  Jelly the tiger is still his constant sleep-time sidekick and he loves having other loveys around him during the day.

There will be a well-baby update in one month and lots more firsts until then.  If I was a bettin' woman, I might even say to be on the lookout for some more travel posts soon! Until then...............

First Babysitter!!

I made a visit to Healing Waters this morning for my first Shellac Mani and Pedi.  I keep looking at my fingers as most manicures last about 5 minutes and this is reported to hold up for 2 WEEKS!  Only time will tell.  Our friend Tracy came to watch Ben while I went to the spa.  Besides being a very sweet person in general, she has LOTS of kiddo experience and will be a kindergarten teacher in our district next fall.  She was Ben's first non-family babysitter and I wasn't worried a bit.  I was truly able to relax and enjoy my morning-thanks Tracy!

Park Playdate

Our playgroup tried out Sedgwick County Park this week for a walk, picnic and playground time.  Playgroup member Cadyn's mom, Tisha, did a hilarious blog post about our adventure that you can read about here.

Below are a couple other pics from the day that she didn't post.......

First Haircut

We took Ben for his first haircut yesterday with Shannon at Cheveaux Salon.  Ok, to be fair, no, he did not get them all cut!  I just wanted a trim over his ears as the long hairs there were nearly covering them at times.  Shannon did a great job matching the rest and really making it look like nothing had been done at all.  Ben sat in my lap and loved the penguin smock he got to wear.  He was in and out quite quickly but hopefully a visit now and again will make the real-deal haircuts he'll have to endure someday trauma and drama free.

 

That big mirror is soooo cool!

le poisson nage......

...Until it gets to your plate.  Clement kindly had us over last night for a dinner of baked tilapia and veggies over rice.  Ryan said it was a meal I "could make anytime."  I was thrilled as Ryan has struggled with the nothing but frozen fish selection we have in Wichita.  That's right dear readers, not even a Whole Paycheck if we wanted to go there and spend our whole paycheck on fresh fish :(.

 

Clement also make a tart au pomme (apple tart) for dessert.  Everything was perfect and delicious.  Ben was happy a little later than normal and although he never complained or fussed, I think his happily talking in his crib at 945pm was a sign we missed our window.  Just something to remember the next time we push bedtime.

 

Handsome Boys

IMPRESSED!!

Yesterday was truly a Monday and it took no time getting started.  I had a dentist appt at 8 and after discovering a broken (with bloody flesh exposed underneath-not about to take clippers to it) toenail on Luke on Sunday, I directed Ryan to call the vet at 8 and try to get an appt.  Don't ya know they got him in right away :).  This meant Ryan had to wrangle Ben and a hurt Luke into the vet while being prepared to leave from there to work.  I walked into the vet's office after the dentist to trade cars and take over the children and what did I see??  Ben in the umbrella stroller happily being fed his cereal by his amazing Dad and Luke curled up at said Dad's feet!!  This moment took my breath away.  There really is no baby involved task too daunting for Ryan.  I seriously got loaded in the car and sat.............and digested.............and wowed.  and then thought, "man, I wish i had my camera for a blog pic!"

Left-Hand Luke (turns out both left feet had torn nails :)

In other IMPRESSED news, Ryan took Ben to the Wichita State Shockers Baseball game on Friday night all on his own while I went out with the girls.  They had a great time and one text said, "our son is quite a flirt."  Apparently a little 2-year-old girl had quite a thing for Ben and he gave her plenty to swoon over.

I didn't have my camera at the vet and Ryan didn't take it to the ball game, but he called me upstairs last night at bath time and I got this one.......sigh.

First Mother's Day

Make that First Mother's Weekend!  When the boys inquired last week about what I wanted to do on Mother's Day, I mentioned Tanganyika Wildlife Park (which this plan-ahead Mom had a Groupon for.)  Until........we discovered Tanganyika was free for Mom's on Mother's Day.  Crazy crowds??-No thanks!  So, we went Saturday, and Tanganyika did not disappoint.  They have many interactive exhibits where you can feed or pet the animals.  They also walk around with other rare or baby animals that don't have their own exhibit.  Ben's favorite was definitely the Nigerian Goats.  I almost kidnapped Frank, (see pictures) and will send a PRIZE to the first reader to respond with why I named him that.

 

A Real-Life Sophie

 

Ben did not care and that lettuce leaf cost $1

Frank

Frank-headshot

I forgot to mention that we started the afternoon with free for Mom's lunch at Pei Wei.  Thanks Changs! We spent the afternoon relaxing as a fam and laughing at Ben the gigglebot. We ended the evening with nachos and Entourage-perfection!-and thanks Angela for the delicious lettuce.  Ryan did say, "these nachos are better than ever."

Whew!, we haven't even made it to Sunday yet!  I hadn't even made it downstairs before I had a cup of coffee in my hand and my day could have ended there.  Ryan doesn't drink coffee so it's always on me to make and I hate those painful minutes while it brews.  Next Ryan prepared "potatoes like my Mom makes," eggs over easy and applesauce filled eableskiver.  On this day, ask and I received!

Next came gifts!

Right before breakfast

He did wake up just in time for the gifts!

In that little blue box is a charm for my Tiffany charm bracelet that will have Ben's name and DOB on it.  I've been dreaming of that little piece of silver since before I was dreaming of Ben! Thank you Nugget.

We have been living without a non-stick pan for months and this one is awesome.  I told Ryan he should have suggested I put omelets on the dinner menu.  Of course I would have responded with, "yeah, and you're gonna make them in what pan?"

After Ben refused a morning nap, we all went for a run.  Peanut butter bonanza smoothies for lunch and then a sensible dinner............actually, it was.   For dinner we had shish-ka-bobs with teriyaki steak, garlic orange shrimp, and veggies over rice pilaf.   I also got to watch The King's Speech in the afternoon, which Ryan had seen on a recent plane trip, and all the accolades the film received were quite justified.

I told the boys at dinner that I couldn't have imagined a more perfect weekend.  Thanks Boys!

Ben's Own Post

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Dear Beautiful Strangers

Dear Beautiful Strangers,

I will never meet most of you and you will most likely never read these words, but my heart aches so much that I need to get them out.

I am so amazingly elated and blessed to be celebrating my first Mother's Day this year, however, I was not prepared for the sadness and guilt that would accompany my joy.  Repeatedly throughout this week, as the big day draws near, I break down with grief because I know so many childless mothers are in such pain.  In fact, our adoption came together so quickly that on Mother's Day last year I never would have dreamed I'd be celebrating this year.

During our struggle to become parents, I got so many well-meaning words of advice that I hated hearing that I now offer them with extreme reservation.

Instead of advice I will share my wishes;

• I wish that every woman who wants to become a mother finds a way or finds peace in being a mother in whatever way she can.
• I wish that every person who came upon parenthood easily would remember to cherish their blessings and treat their children well.
• Of course I wish there was mandatory insurance coverage for infertility treatments, and that both the domestic and international adoption processes were filled with less red-tape, bureaucracy, and COST.
• I wish the whole world were versed in fertility etiquette and that everyone knew how painful simple questions like, "when are you gonna finally have kids?" or "you must not want kids?" can be.
• I wish every great Mom and Dad in waiting could have a baby before watching their friends and family get blessed with their 3rd,.... 4th,..... 5th...... children.

However, as the saying goes, If wishes were horses ...... So wishing is not enough.  So I will;

• I will cherish my miracle son every day and keep my overwhelming gratefulness for his birthmom's decision in the front of my mind and top of my heart as he grows.
• I will work to educate mis-informed people I encounter and share the good and bad of what we've learned with those that it can help.
• I will stay connected to RESOLVE, the national infertility organization, and stay educated about legislation that can affect fertility rights.  I will continue to write to government officials where and when I can and stay on the look-out for support groups forming where I live that I might be able to help.
• Finally, I will never forget the pain that I shared with so many and the amazing gift that parenthood is.

In a perfect world, every woman who wanted to be a Mom on Mother's Day would be.  I hope there is some comfort in knowing that many before you who struggled and were blessed will never forget the pain or the struggle and will always be here with a listening ear and a supportive shoulder.  Because many stories of success kept my hope alive, I can offer one more and the advice to persevere.

With love, support and hope-Jess

Hat Head

I was out gardening in several different stints yesterday and Ben is a very good helper.  He sits happily in his swing and only requires a push every 5 minutes or so, and sometimes not at all.  At one point yesterday when we came in and I took his hat off......

 

Sorry Nuggs, I couldn't resist.  Look for a First Haircut post coming soon!

Respect the Schedule

I am a firm believer as a parent that kids need a schedule.  I know this is a controversial topic in some parenting circles, but I stand firm in my belief of its necessity.  That said, I also believe you can't stop living your life when kids come.  This week the proper balance of all this has come into question for Ben and me.  I think one of the most challenging parts is that just when we have one sleeping schedule down, it changes!  Feeding has settled quite a bit the last few months and I think we have a happy schedule and a happy baby in that department.  But I digress, back to sleeping.......Depending on the days activities and when he wakes up, it seems Ben's sleep needs can vary greatly.  Some days he sleeps from 930 am-1130 am and then is obviously not ready for a marathon nap at 1230 or 1.  On those days he goes back down for 1.5-2 hours anywhere between 2 and 4.  I thought we had happily settled into a 45 minute nap at 930 and a long one in the afternoon but it's just not the case.  This week we had a couple of activites planned at 1030 and Ben showed tired signs at home about 930.  In both cases he got short naps in the car but also had awful, crankopotomus filled afternoons and a feeding schedule that flew right out the window with everything else.  The goal here in the next couple months is to cut out the morning nap altogether and have one gloriously long afternoon nap.

When we were stuck at home all day with Riley here, it didn't matter much, but now that we'd like to get out into the world more, it is a challenge.  I also need to remember that most of our playmates are older and need less sleep.  In addition, because Ben is bigger and taller than most babies his age, he graduated from the infant carrier earlier.  It would all be easier if I could transition him into and out of places while leaving him asleep in the carseat.  It was also only a few weeks ago when he still needed an evening snooze and that seems like ancient history.  

The bigger challenge is my type A, "master planner" (as someone said), personality.  I start each day going over the plan in my head and usually have it down to 15 minute increments.  (Mom, I know what you're thinking here and you can keep it to yourself :)) That said, when we are off by even 30 minutes, entire activities or tasks have to be scrapped or rescheduled.  I also realize, Dear Readers, that these activities are not of earth shattering importance, but to me, they are LIFE.  

The Solution

I think a first important step is to not schedule exact time activities like yoga, Tot Tuesday, or play-dates on back to back days.  This way if his schedule is blown to bits one day, he'll get the comfort of having it back the next.  And really, if I fill his schedule at 8 months, what will life be like when he's 14?

Next, I need to filter which activites and tasks are time sensitive and which are not.  One big problem is my running.  I work all day to eat and drink appropriately so I will be prepared to run when Ben is not asleep and voila!-out the window.  The simple solution for that is to always run first thing after Ben gets his bottle.  And really who is gonna be out at 6 am wondering why I'm running with my baby in PJ's?? 

For the tasks and activities that don't have to happen at an exact time, I just need to keep a running list and maybe assign the amount of time I think each task will take and do and reassign according to Ben's needs.

Finally, I know these will all be problems of the past in a few short months and I have definitely been focusing on soaking up every minute of cuddle and rocker snuggles.  I need to focus on tuning into baby first and the world second.  Like everything in life, it's a delicate balance and what fun would it be if I had it all figured out?

 

At 3 weeks, when he couldn't even stay awake through a photo shoot.

 

At 2 months, in the glorious carseat where he could sleep (happily) anywhere.

Tot Tuesday

Our local Kansas Humane Society has a special childhood education program and on the first Tuesday of every month they host Tot Tuesday for tiny babes through 4ish-year-olds.  Although they sometimes do special events like Clifford appearances (which we missed last time), the standard Tot Tuesday includes a couple of animal related stories followed by an activity and meeting with some animals.  

This week after story time, the kids that could filled recycled water bottles with food and sealed the top with peanut butter.  I guess like a cheap and dirty make-shift Kong.  There were lots of large and fine motor skills used in the bottle making and a great reward in getting to hand your handiwork off to a deserving pup.  We obviously couldn't participate in most of this and chose to walk around the outside of the kennels while the other kiddos were inside giving their treats.  

I was extra thankful Tisha and Cadyn were in attendance as I reached for the camera only to find the battery dead, and Ben made some great new friends.  He absolutely loved a smaller Jack Russell mix and giggled and giggled at his pawing on the glass.  He also loved watching a puppy run around outside.  I wondered why we never get a similar reaction to our pups at home, but it must have been their small size and the glass separation.  He did seem pretty enamored with Luke last night but both Ryan and I wondered if it was coincidence that he was finally starting to feel like himself after his cold recovery or if those little pups really did add a new awareness.

Either way the day was a success (not so much the lunch after-but we can omit that part), and we'll go back next month, or maybe before if I need a good session of giggles!  

(Thanks again Tisha for the pics.)